Protecting Your Florida LGBTQ+ Family

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If you or a member of your family identifies as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, or otherwise (LGBTQ+), you are likely feeling under siege from the rhetoric and actions of Florida and national politicians.  You may be wondering what you can do to protect your family’s rights.  This blog discusses steps that you can take to shore up your Florida LGBTQ+ family law rights.

Adopting Your Children

If you are in a same-sex relationship and have children with your partner/spouse, and if you are not a biological parent, you need to adopt your children.  This recommendation surprises a lot of families.  But I have seen heart-breaking situations where a couple splits up, the non-biological parent is denied recognition of their parenthood, and all contact is cut off between that parent and the children until the children are adults.

Even if your children were born during your marriage, if you are a non-biological parent, you should adopt.  Though there is a presumption that a child born during an intact marriage is the legal child of both parents, the likely applicable statute still uses language that only recognizes straight parents.  Section 742.11, Florida Statutes, states the following:

(1) Except in the case of gestational surrogacy, any child born within wedlock who has been conceived by the means of artificial or in vitro insemination is irrebuttably presumed to be the child of the husband and wife, provided that both husband and wife have consented in writing to the artificial or in vitro insemination.
(2) Except in the case of gestational surrogacy, any child born within wedlock who has been conceived by means of donated eggs or preembryos shall be irrebuttably presumed to be the child of the recipient gestating woman and her husband, provided that both parties have consented in writing to the use of donated eggs or preembryos.

When gestational surrogacy is utilized, section 742.13, Florida Statutes, still defines a “commissioning couple” as “the intended mother and father of a child who will be conceived…”

Because case law and legal presumptions can change, and because same-sex parents who utilize artificial insemination, in vitro fertilization, and other methods have not had their rights codified by statute, I urge you to look into adopting your children.

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8 Tips For Co-Parenting After a Hurricane

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Co-parenting during a divorce is challenging under normal circumstances, and dealing with the aftermath of a devastating hurricane adds another layer of difficulty. Here are some practical tips to navigate this situation effectively.  As a preview, many of these tips can be best accomplished within a Collaborative Divorce.

1. Prioritize the Children’s Well-Being

Keep routines as consistent as possible, such as school, meals, and bedtime, to provide stability.  Be honest with your children in an age-appropriate way about what’s happening but reassure them they are safe and loved.  Avoid speaking negatively about the other parent in front of the children.

2. Communicate Effectively

Use clear, respectful, and focused communication to coordinate on parenting issues.  Consider using co-parenting apps like OurFamilyWizard or TalkingParents to document agreements and streamline communication if direct interaction is too challenging.

3. Develop a Flexible Parenting Plan

A hurricane might have disrupted your previous arrangements, so work together to create a temporary plan that accounts for housing, transportation, and other logistical challenges.  Be prepared to adjust custody schedules based on access to safe housing and resources.

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Video: Cordover Keynotes Family Law Now Virtual Summit

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Family Diplomacy managing attorney Adam B. Cordover recently gave the keynote address at the Third Annual Family Law Now Virtual Summit. The aim of the Summit is to provide legal professionals and those individuals facing separation, divorce, and other family law matters with vital information, strategies, and tools to support them as they navigate through the process.  The Summit was hosted by veteran Canadian lawyer Russell Alexander and benefitted The Denise House, which provides a safe shelter and supportive programs in Canada for women, with or without children, experiencing gender-based violence.

Examining Models of Collaborative Practice

The topic of the keynote address was “All the Ways to Collaborate: Examining Different Models of Collaborative Practice.”  In the keynote, Cordover urged lawyers to tailor the Collaborative Process to meet the needs of their family law clients.

You can view a video of the keynote, which is about 20 minutes long, below.

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Saint Petersburg Adult Adoption Lawyer Review: “Thorough, Professional, And A Pleasure to Work With!”

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We care about our clients, and we find it especially heartwarming when a client takes the time to let others know about our services.

A recent adult adoption client left a review of our work on our St. Petersburg Family Law Firm Google Page.

St. Petersburg Adult Adoption Lawyer Review

Adam and Jennifer were fantastic. I adopted a longtime friend to be a part of my family and with their help the whole process was very simple. Adam and Jennifer took care of everything right up to and now after the Final Judgement hearing. I would highly recommend Family Diplomacy as they are very through, professional and a pleasure to work with!

Now, we cannot guarantee the same or similar results for you or your family as every case is different.  However, if you would like to learn more about adult adoption, stepparent adoption, grandparent adoption, close relative adoption, second parent adoption, and/or LGBTQ+ adoption, we welcome you to reach out to us and find out more.  We represent clients throughout the State of Florida, and we also have offices in Tampa, St. Petersburg, and Sarasota.

Click Here to Speak with an Adoption Lawyer

Financial Education Books For Spouses Going Through Divorce

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It is common when going through divorce in Florida or elsewhere for one or both spouses to be lost when it comes to finances and retirement planning.  One of the best things that you can do to make divorce less traumatic and to help ensure that you and your spouse’s interests are being met is to involve a Neutral Financial Professional within a Collaborative Divorce process.

It is also important to educate yourself when it comes to finances.  Below are a list of books that I have personally found helpful to educate myself.  Even if you are not going through divorce, you may get something from these resources.

The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey

If you have medical school student loans, a high interest mortgage or home equity lines of credit, or other forms of large debt, and you just don’t know how you could possibly pay it off in any reasonable amount of time, Dave Ramsey’s The Total Money Makeover is for you.  As someone who went to a very expensive law school and incurred six figures in educational debt, I found this book immensely helpful.  I am a big believer in the Financial Independence (sometimes also called Financial Independence Retire Early, or “FIRE”) movement; so many influencers who have put themselves on the path to FIRE have mentioned that they started off by getting out of debt after reading this book.

The Simple Path to Wealth by J.L. Collins

J.L. Collins’ The Simple Path to Wealth is the book I wish I read when I was just starting my career.  His main message is that investing does not need to be complex, the stock market will crash but it will also rebound and grow, and that you can build significant wealth over time by simply investing in a total U.S. stock market index fund and maybe also a total U.S. bond index fund (depending on your age and risk tolerance).  J.L. Collins is known as the Godfather of FIRE, and he tells audiences that you can actually find most of the ideas in the book for free in their raw form in his blog’s Stock Series.  I have found both the book and Stock Series helpful to explain the markets and prevent me from selling my portfolio when the market has crashed.  Further, the Stock Series, which Collins updates regularly, does a good job at explaining many of the types of investment vehicles that get addressed in divorce, such as brokerage accounts, traditional and Roth 401(k)s, traditional and Roth IRAs, 403(b)s, and TSPs.  Beyond educating yourself, The Simple Path to Wealth may be a great book to provide as a gift to your young adult children as the content started as a letter to J.L. Collins’ daughter, explaining to someone who didn’t want to think about investing how they could build wealth without giving it much thought.

I Will Teach You to Be Rich by Ramit Sethi

Admittedly, the title is kind of cringeworthy, but I found the content in Ramit Sethi’s I Will Teach You to Be Rich to be helpful nonetheless.  He provides very practical advice on everything from lowering interest rates you pay on credit cards, to opening high yield savings accounts, to automating saving and investing.  He also believes strongly that you don’t need to live like a hermit to build wealth, and that it is important to mindfully spend money on those things that bring you happiness.

Atomic Habits by James Clear

James Clear’s Atomic Habits explores the science of habit formation and how small, incremental changes can lead you to significant improvements over time.  Clear stresses that consistent, tiny improvements—what he calls “atomic habits”—can compound over time, leading to profound personal and professional transformations.  His concepts mesh pretty well with the books discussed above, especially when he addresses the power of compound interest to transform small, consistent investments over a long period of time to vast amounts of wealth.  Besides becoming financially healthier, this book helped me become physically healthier, as well, by influencing me to make small, consistent changes in my diet and exercise, leading to the shedding of 30+ pounds over the course of eighteen months.

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How Are Medical School Student Loans Handled In a Florida Divorce?

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When you’re facing a divorce in Florida, one of the complex financial issues you might encounter is how to handle student loans, particularly medical school student loans. These debts can be substantial, often amounting to hundreds of thousands of dollars, and it’s natural to wonder how they will be treated during the divorce process. Understanding your options and rights is crucial, especially if you and your spouse are seeking a Collaborative Divorce, which focuses on finding amicable solutions privately rather than through a public divorce court battle.

Understanding Marital vs. Non-Marital Debt – Med School Loans

In Florida, the law distinguishes between marital and non-marital assets and debts. Marital debts are those incurred during the marriage, regardless of whose name they are in or who incurred them. Non-marital debts, on the other hand, are typically those incurred before the marriage or after the date of separation.

If you took out medical school loans before you were married, these debts are generally considered non-marital, meaning you would be solely responsible for them. However, if you took out the loans during the marriage, things get a bit more complicated.

Medical School Student Loans as Marital Debt

If your medical school student loans were taken out during your marriage, they will be considered marital debt. This means that both you and your spouse could be responsible for repaying them, even if it was taken out in only one spouse’s name.  If some student loans were taken out prior to the marriage and other medical school debt was taken out during the marriage, then some loans will likely be considered non-marital and other med school loans will be considered marital. In a traditional divorce, this could lead to a lengthy and contentious battle, especially if the loans are significant.  More commonly, especially in a Collaborative Divorce, only one spouse ends up taking responsibility for paying off the marital portion of the loans, while they also typically get something in return to offset the debt.  Alternatively, the other spouse may take on a different set of debts as an offset.

In a Collaborative Divorce, you and your spouse have the opportunity to work together to find a fair and equitable solution. The Collaborative Process encourages open communication and cooperation, allowing both of you to express your concerns and preferences.

At the end of the day, a court will likely order, and most divorcing spouses agree on, an equal distribution of your family’s marital net worth.  So, for example, if your family has a total of $3 million in marital assets and $1 million in marital debts, equaling a net marital estate of $2 million, then likely each of you will end up with around a net worth of $1 million from the marital estate (though most people agree to an equal distribution of your marital assets/debts, you can also agree to an unequal distribution if it makes sense for your family or as an alternative to alimony).  For this reason, when determining how you are going to split your assets and debts, it is important to look at not just one debt, like medical school student loans, but at your family’s full financial picture.

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St. Petersburg Divorce Lawyer Review: “Absolutely Outstanding Service”

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We are humbled every time a client takes the time out of their busy schedule to leave a review and let others know about their experience.  Below you will find a recent review left by a client on our St. Petersburg office Google Page:

Absolutely outstanding service from Adam and team at Family Diplomacy: A Collaborative Law Firm! From the very beginning, they demonstrated immense professionalism and empathy. They guided me through the entire process, explaining everything clearly and ensuring I understood my options. Their expertise and strategic approach led to a favorable outcome, and I couldn’t be more grateful. I highly recommend their services to anyone going through a difficult time like divorce. Thank you for your exceptional support and dedication!

As I am required to state by the Florida Bar, each circumstance is different, and we cannot guarantee any particular result.  But we sure would like to try!

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Kiplinger: “Think of Prenups and Postnups as Financial Planning Tools”

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In an insightful article in Kiplinger, “Think of Prenups and Postnups as Financial Planning Tools,” Andrew Hatherly, a Chartered Retirement Planning Counselor, delves into how prenuptial and postnuptial agreements are not just for those planning for the worst.  Rather, they can be essential tools in financial planning, particularly for couples marrying later in life. This blog post discusses the contents of article, which you can read here.

When you think of prenuptial and postnuptial agreements, what comes to mind? For many, it’s the idea of planning for a potential divorce. However, these agreements can be so much more than just a contingency plan—they can be crucial financial planning tools that help you and your partner start your marriage on solid ground, especially if you’re marrying later in life or have substantial assets.

Why Consider a Prenup or Postnup?

In today’s world, where financial independence is increasingly important, prenups and postnups (which is like a prenup, but it is signed after you are already married) offer a clear framework for managing your assets. Whether you’re entering a marriage with significant wealth, a business, or debts, these agreements provide clarity. They help you and your partner establish expectations and protect what matters most to you both.

If you’re getting married later in life, you likely have accumulated assets, retirement accounts, or even a business that you want to safeguard. A prenup or postnup can protect these assets and ensure they’re distributed according to your wishes, not just the default laws of your state. Additionally, if one or both of you have children from a previous marriage, a prenup or postnup can help ensure that they’re provided for.

Debts: A Growing Concern

Let’s not forget about debt. Whether it’s from student loans, credit cards, or a previous mortgage, debts are increasingly common. A prenup or postnup allows you to specify how these liabilities will be managed during your marriage. This means one partner isn’t left responsible for the other’s debts, which can alleviate a significant source of stress and conflict.

Financial Transparency and Communication

One of the biggest benefits of drafting a prenuptial or postnuptial agreement is the open financial dialogue it fosters between you and your partner. These agreements require both you and your fiancé/spouse to fully disclose their financial situation, including assets, debts, and income. This transparency can prevent future misunderstandings and ensure that you both are on the same page when it comes to money management.

It’s not just about protecting yourself; it’s about ensuring that your financial partnership is built on honesty and mutual respect. By having these discussions early on, you set the tone for how you’ll handle financial decisions throughout your marriage.

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Cordover Joins Sarasota Collaborative Family Law Professionals

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Family Diplomacy managing attorney Adam B. Cordover has joined the Sarasota Collaborative Family Law Professionals (“SCFLP”) practice group.

About the Sarasota Collaborative Family Law Professionals

SCFLP is similar to a local bar association (it is not a law firm), and it is a membership-based organization made up of independent lawyers, psychologist, therapists, accountants, and financial planners who believe that there are better alternatives to court-based divorce.  Specifically, the group educates professionals and the public about Collaborative Divorce and Family Law, and its members help families through the Collaborative Process.

As stated in the Sarasota group’s brochure, “All members of SCFLP have extensive experience in the area of family law. They are committed to the collaborative process and work together to reach a settlement on fair and equitable terms without the financial and emotional cost that often accompanies litigation. All members of SCFLP have extensive experience in the area of family law, and are licensed by their respective designated professional organization. Each completes the training required by the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals (IACP).”

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Cordover Presents on Collaborative Mediation for International Academy of Collaborative Professionals

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On July 17, 2024 at 1:00 pm Eastern Time, Family Diplomacy managing attorney Adam B. Cordover will co-present a webinar on “Collaborative Mediation: Engaging Mediators in the Collaborative Process.”  The presentation is for the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals and sponsored by OurFamilyWizard.

Adam’s co-presenters are Heather McArthur, co-founder and president of Collaborative Professionals of Central Florida and a Florida Supreme Court Certified Family Law Mediator, and Keith Grossman, a Florida Supreme Court Approved Primary Family Mediation Trainer and president of the Southwest Florida Collaborative Professionals Association.

Click Here to Learn More and Register

Adam’s Philosophy on Collaborative Divorce

Adam’s philosophy is that almost anybody going through divorce can benefit from a Collaborative Divorce, but that we professionals need to have as many tools as possible to help as many families as possible.  Rather than try to force a family into a particular model of Collaborative Practice, we should shape a model to meet that family’s needs.  Many Collaborative Lawyers have heard of models such as One-Coach/Neutral Facilitator, Two Coach, or Lawyer-Only.  This presentation will discuss a different model: Collaborative Mediation.

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