Tag Archive for: collaborative family law

Video: Cordover Keynotes Family Law Now Virtual Summit

Family Diplomacy managing attorney Adam B. Cordover recently gave the keynote address at the Third Annual Family Law Now Virtual Summit. The aim of the Summit is to provide legal professionals and those individuals facing separation, divorce, and other family law matters with vital information, strategies, and tools to support them as they navigate through the process.  The Summit was hosted by veteran Canadian lawyer Russell Alexander and benefitted The Denise House, which provides a safe shelter and supportive programs in Canada for women, with or without children, experiencing gender-based violence.

Examining Models of Collaborative Practice

The topic of the keynote address was “All the Ways to Collaborate: Examining Different Models of Collaborative Practice.”  In the keynote, Cordover urged lawyers to tailor the Collaborative Process to meet the needs of their family law clients.

You can view a video of the keynote, which is about 20 minutes long, below.

Read more

Financial Education Books For Spouses Going Through Divorce

It is common when going through divorce in Florida or elsewhere for one or both spouses to be lost when it comes to finances and retirement planning.  One of the best things that you can do to make divorce less traumatic and to help ensure that you and your spouse’s interests are being met is to involve a Neutral Financial Professional within a Collaborative Divorce process.

It is also important to educate yourself when it comes to finances.  Below are a list of books that I have personally found helpful to educate myself.  Even if you are not going through divorce, you may get something from these resources.

The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey

If you have medical school student loans, a high interest mortgage or home equity lines of credit, or other forms of large debt, and you just don’t know how you could possibly pay it off in any reasonable amount of time, Dave Ramsey’s The Total Money Makeover is for you.  As someone who went to a very expensive law school and incurred six figures in educational debt, I found this book immensely helpful.  I am a big believer in the Financial Independence (sometimes also called Financial Independence Retire Early, or “FIRE”) movement; so many influencers who have put themselves on the path to FIRE have mentioned that they started off by getting out of debt after reading this book.

The Simple Path to Wealth by J.L. Collins

J.L. Collins’ The Simple Path to Wealth is the book I wish I read when I was just starting my career.  His main message is that investing does not need to be complex, the stock market will crash but it will also rebound and grow, and that you can build significant wealth over time by simply investing in a total U.S. stock market index fund and maybe also a total U.S. bond index fund (depending on your age and risk tolerance).  J.L. Collins is known as the Godfather of FIRE, and he tells audiences that you can actually find most of the ideas in the book for free in their raw form in his blog’s Stock Series.  I have found both the book and Stock Series helpful to explain the markets and prevent me from selling my portfolio when the market has crashed.  Further, the Stock Series, which Collins updates regularly, does a good job at explaining many of the types of investment vehicles that get addressed in divorce, such as brokerage accounts, traditional and Roth 401(k)s, traditional and Roth IRAs, 403(b)s, and TSPs.  Beyond educating yourself, The Simple Path to Wealth may be a great book to provide as a gift to your young adult children as the content started as a letter to J.L. Collins’ daughter, explaining to someone who didn’t want to think about investing how they could build wealth without giving it much thought.

I Will Teach You to Be Rich by Ramit Sethi

Admittedly, the title is kind of cringeworthy, but I found the content in Ramit Sethi’s I Will Teach You to Be Rich to be helpful nonetheless.  He provides very practical advice on everything from lowering interest rates you pay on credit cards, to opening high yield savings accounts, to automating saving and investing.  He also believes strongly that you don’t need to live like a hermit to build wealth, and that it is important to mindfully spend money on those things that bring you happiness.

Atomic Habits by James Clear

James Clear’s Atomic Habits explores the science of habit formation and how small, incremental changes can lead you to significant improvements over time.  Clear stresses that consistent, tiny improvements—what he calls “atomic habits”—can compound over time, leading to profound personal and professional transformations.  His concepts mesh pretty well with the books discussed above, especially when he addresses the power of compound interest to transform small, consistent investments over a long period of time to vast amounts of wealth.  Besides becoming financially healthier, this book helped me become physically healthier, as well, by influencing me to make small, consistent changes in my diet and exercise, leading to the shedding of 30+ pounds over the course of eighteen months.

Read more

How Are Medical School Student Loans Handled In a Florida Divorce?

When you’re facing a divorce in Florida, one of the complex financial issues you might encounter is how to handle student loans, particularly medical school student loans. These debts can be substantial, often amounting to hundreds of thousands of dollars, and it’s natural to wonder how they will be treated during the divorce process. Understanding your options and rights is crucial, especially if you and your spouse are seeking a Collaborative Divorce, which focuses on finding amicable solutions privately rather than through a public divorce court battle.

Understanding Marital vs. Non-Marital Debt – Med School Loans

In Florida, the law distinguishes between marital and non-marital assets and debts. Marital debts are those incurred during the marriage, regardless of whose name they are in or who incurred them. Non-marital debts, on the other hand, are typically those incurred before the marriage or after the date of separation.

If you took out medical school loans before you were married, these debts are generally considered non-marital, meaning you would be solely responsible for them. However, if you took out the loans during the marriage, things get a bit more complicated.

Medical School Student Loans as Marital Debt

If your medical school student loans were taken out during your marriage, they will be considered marital debt. This means that both you and your spouse could be responsible for repaying them, even if it was taken out in only one spouse’s name.  If some student loans were taken out prior to the marriage and other medical school debt was taken out during the marriage, then some loans will likely be considered non-marital and other med school loans will be considered marital. In a traditional divorce, this could lead to a lengthy and contentious battle, especially if the loans are significant.  More commonly, especially in a Collaborative Divorce, only one spouse ends up taking responsibility for paying off the marital portion of the loans, while they also typically get something in return to offset the debt.  Alternatively, the other spouse may take on a different set of debts as an offset.

In a Collaborative Divorce, you and your spouse have the opportunity to work together to find a fair and equitable solution. The Collaborative Process encourages open communication and cooperation, allowing both of you to express your concerns and preferences.

At the end of the day, a court will likely order, and most divorcing spouses agree on, an equal distribution of your family’s marital net worth.  So, for example, if your family has a total of $3 million in marital assets and $1 million in marital debts, equaling a net marital estate of $2 million, then likely each of you will end up with around a net worth of $1 million from the marital estate (though most people agree to an equal distribution of your marital assets/debts, you can also agree to an unequal distribution if it makes sense for your family or as an alternative to alimony).  For this reason, when determining how you are going to split your assets and debts, it is important to look at not just one debt, like medical school student loans, but at your family’s full financial picture.

Read more

Cordover Joins Sarasota Collaborative Family Law Professionals

Family Diplomacy managing attorney Adam B. Cordover has joined the Sarasota Collaborative Family Law Professionals (“SCFLP”) practice group.

About the Sarasota Collaborative Family Law Professionals

SCFLP is similar to a local bar association (it is not a law firm), and it is a membership-based organization made up of independent lawyers, psychologist, therapists, accountants, and financial planners who believe that there are better alternatives to court-based divorce.  Specifically, the group educates professionals and the public about Collaborative Divorce and Family Law, and its members help families through the Collaborative Process.

As stated in the Sarasota group’s brochure, “All members of SCFLP have extensive experience in the area of family law. They are committed to the collaborative process and work together to reach a settlement on fair and equitable terms without the financial and emotional cost that often accompanies litigation. All members of SCFLP have extensive experience in the area of family law, and are licensed by their respective designated professional organization. Each completes the training required by the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals (IACP).”

Read more

Cordover Presents on Collaborative Mediation for International Academy of Collaborative Professionals

On July 17, 2024 at 1:00 pm Eastern Time, Family Diplomacy managing attorney Adam B. Cordover will co-present a webinar on “Collaborative Mediation: Engaging Mediators in the Collaborative Process.”  The presentation is for the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals and sponsored by OurFamilyWizard.

Adam’s co-presenters are Heather McArthur, co-founder and president of Collaborative Professionals of Central Florida and a Florida Supreme Court Certified Family Law Mediator, and Keith Grossman, a Florida Supreme Court Approved Primary Family Mediation Trainer and president of the Southwest Florida Collaborative Professionals Association.

Adam’s Philosophy on Collaborative Divorce

Adam’s philosophy is that almost anybody going through divorce can benefit from a Collaborative Divorce, but that we professionals need to have as many tools as possible to help as many families as possible.  Rather than try to force a family into a particular model of Collaborative Practice, we should shape a model to meet that family’s needs.  Many Collaborative Lawyers have heard of models such as One-Coach/Neutral Facilitator, Two Coach, or Lawyer-Only.  This presentation will discuss a different model: Collaborative Mediation.

Read more

Divorcing Wealthy in Florida

What is the best way to end up wealthy after divorce?  It is by being even wealthier before divorce.  The truth is that divorce is not cheap.  But there are things that you can do to help preserve your wealth even if your marriage is ending.

Retain a Neutral Financial Professional

One of the biggest challenges when going through divorce is that one spouse typically knows more about the family finances than the other spouse.  If you are the spouse with the knowledge, this can be frustrating because you feel you are making reasonable proposals that would benefit your spouse, and yet your spouse is outright rejecting them or refuses to make a decision, costing your family even more time and money.  If you are the spouse without knowledge of the family finances, you feel like your spouse is trying to control you by badgering you to agree to their proposal, but how can you even make a decision that could have disastrous consequences for your long term financial future?

This is where a Neutral Financial Professional comes in.

Read more

The Neutral Financial Professional in Collaborative Divorce: Saving Your Family Time and Money

Are you considering divorce? If so, you’re likely familiar with the emotional strain that comes with it. But amidst the whirlwind of emotions, it’s easy to overlook the importance of your family’s financial future when considering your divorce options. That’s where a Neutral Financial Professional steps in as an invaluable member of a Collaborative Divorce team. Let’s delve into what a Financial Professional does in this process and how they can help your family save money while preserving your financial well-being.

Collaborative Divorce

First and foremost, it’s essential to understand the Collaborative Divorce approach. Unlike traditional litigated divorces, where trial lawyers are retained and there is the constant threat or reality of a court battle, Collaborative Divorce emphasizes transparency, cooperation, and durable resolutions. The Collaborative Team typically comprises of specially-trained lawyers for each spouse, a team leader known as a Neutral Facilitator, and a Neutral Financial Professional. All professionals, once the process starts, can only help with out-of-court dispute resolution, and they are prohibited from being used to fight in court.  The Collaborative Approach fosters open communication, leading to more amicable resolutions and, compared to litigated court battles, significant cost savings.

Role of the Neutral Financial Professional

Now, let’s shine a light on the role of the Neutral Financial Professional on the Collaborative Divorce team. As a Collaborative Lawyer, I often emphasize the pivotal role they play in ensuring fair and sustainable financial outcomes for both spouses. Here’s how they do it:

1. Financial Clarity

Divorce involves complex financial matters, from asset division to spousal support and child support. A Neutral Financial Professional brings clarity to this complexity by helping each of you analyze your financial situation.   This is important, as it is common in divorce for one spouse to be less knowledgeable about the family’s finances than the other spouse.  This disparity in knowledge oftentimes causes one spouse to freeze in the face of making long-term decisions out of fear of making the wrong decision, causes long delays and increased fees for both spouses.

Accordingly, the Financial Professional helps explain your family’s assets, liabilities, income, and expenses to provide a clear picture of your financial standing. This clarity is crucial for making informed decisions during negotiations, preventing surprises down the road.

Read more

Collaborative Jewish Divorce

In these uncertain times, if you are Jewish and considering divorce, you may wonder where you can safely turn.  I have watched in horror at the chants of “Jews will not replace us” in Charlottesville in 2017, the massacres of Israeli civilians on October 7th, and the more recent intimidation of Jewish students on campuses across the U.S.  I have personally experienced people telling antisemitic jokes to me, apparently not realizing that I was Jewish.   If, with this as a backdrop, you are facing the upheaval of divorce, let us help you and your family through a Collaborative Jewish Divorce.

Read more

Defining “Collaborative Mediation”

If you do a Google search for “Collaborative Mediation,” you will get all sorts of results, many of which have nothing to do with one another.  Many articles simply point out the differences between Collaborative Divorce and Mediation (one of my blog posts would be included with this group).

Other articles will use the term to be a synonym with Collaborative Divorce, referring to neutral professionals (typically a financial professional and licensed mental health professional) as mediators, even if those professionals have not been trained as mediators.  This seems misleading to me.   Still, other articles use the term to mean a friendly mediation or an interdisciplinary co-mediation where lawyers are optional.  I have concerns about those articles because, despite using the term “collaborative,” what they describe is not a Collaborative Law Process as defined by the Florida Statutes or Uniform Collaborative Law Act/Rules.  Again, this is misleading.

I recently was at the 12th Annual Conference of the Florida Academy of Collaborative Professionals (“FACP”) where I presented on the topic of “Collaborative Mediation: Engaging Mediators in the Collaborative Process.”  My co-presenters were Heather McArthur, co-founder and president of Collaborative Professionals of Central Florida and Florida Supreme Court Certified Family Law Mediator, and Keith Grossman, a Florida Supreme Court Approved Primary Family Mediation Trainer and president of the Southwest Florida Collaborative Professionals Association.

As I have not found a good definition anywhere else, one of my goals in co-presenting on this topic (and writing this article) was to define the term “Collaborative Mediation.”  Additionally, I hoped to shed light on this distinct model of Collaborative Practice, find a way to better engage mediators in the Collaborative Process, and offer an option under certain circumstances that could bring more clients and lawyers into the Collaborative Method.

Read more

Collaborative Divorce: What Does A Facilitator Do?

In a Collaborative Divorce, the Facilitator plays a crucial role in keeping everyone on task, aiding communication, managing emotions between you and your spouse, and, where applicable, tailoring a parenting plan for your children. A Facilitator is a professional who is licensed under Chapter 490 or 491, Florida Statutes.  Here are some specific tasks they might undertake:

1. Project Management:

Facilitators are the project managers of the Collaborative Process.  Without a clear direction, divorce negotiations can get off track real fast.  The Facilitator keeps you and your lawyers focused on your interests rather than positions, works so that we are making the most efficient use of your time and money during team meetings, and checks in to see whether everyone has completed the tasks assigned to them.

2. Emotional Support:

Facilitators provide emotional support to both you and your spouse throughout the Collaborative Process. Divorce can be a highly stressful and emotional experience, even under the best of circumstances, and having a trained professional to talk to can be invaluable.

3. Communication Facilitation:

They help facilitate communication between the you and your spouse, ensuring that discussions remain productive and respectful. This can include helping each each of you express your needs and concerns effectively and ensuring that you both feel heard and understood.

Read more