I recently had the pleasure to speak via zoom with a Collaborative Law class at the Indiana University Robert H. McKinney School of Law. I was invited by Joshua Jones, who is a Visiting Assistant Clinical Professor of Law.
During the class, I was asked to talk about a whole variety of issues related to Collaborative Divorce and Family Law, including the following:
Most people think of divorce as a declaration of war. That is not the way it has to be. Even if there are feelings of anger during separation, parents can work together to determine how they will continue to work together towards the best interests of their children.
In the link to the video below, Anne Lucas, Board Member of the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals, interviews Nikki DeBartolo and Ben Heldfond of Tampa Bay. They went through a Collaborative Divorce, and they outlined their experience in their book, Our Happy Divorce.
I recently had the opportunity to interview ADR legend Forrest “Woody” Mosten. Woody has been on the forefront of Mediation and Collaborative Practice and is the founder of Unbundled Legal Services. Woody also happens to be a friend and mentor of mine and my co-author of “Building A Successful Collaborative Family Law Practice” published by the American Bar Association in 2018. You can find the video below.
You can find the Peacemaker Practice Self Survey reproduced below.
PEACEMAKER PRACTICE SELF-SURVEY
Forrest S. Mosten and Kevin Scudder[1]
Peacemaker Professionals are lawyers, mental health professionals, and financial professionals who deliver services to clients in a number of roles: Advisor, Information Provider, Organizer, Legal Counselor, Mediator, Evaluator, and other forms as service-provider.
We strive to meet our clients’ needs during difficult times, and we are especially appreciative when clients share how we were able to help them. A client recently left a glowing review for Collaborative Divorce services that we provided. The review was left on Avvo.com.
Please note that every family’s situation is different, and we cannot promise the same or similar results for your family.
Collaborative Divorce Success Story
I highly recommend Adam Cordover. I had not heard of a collaborative divorce before my therapist recommended I speak with Adam. When I first met with him, he was warm and shared excellent information. I never felt pressured to do anything. I was seeking a divorce after a LONG marriage. There were bumps in the road but with the assistance of Adam and the team he assisted us put together, my former spouse and I were able to conclude a collaborative divorce and remain friends. The team approach allowed my ex-husband and I to turn what could have been a disaster into a continued mutual friendship. From start to finish, approximately 6 months, Adam and Jennifer were there for me every step of the way.
(emphasis added)
-Anonymous
Five Stars
If you are looking for a more peaceful way to go through divorce, we are here to help.
Adam B. Cordover is a leading Collaborative Divorce Lawyer in Tampa Bay who helps clients throughout the State of Florida. He is an American Bar Association published author and member of the Board of the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals. Adam has taught lawyers, mental health professionals, financial professionals, and mediators throughout the United States, Canada, France, and Israel how to offer Collaborative services.
These are not normal times, and coronavirus is changing every aspect of life from working, to shopping, to interacting with family. Divorce is not immune to these changes, and the way you approach divorce must, by necessity, be different.
Here are tips on divorcing during coronavirus.
Divorce is difficult enough in the best of times. During coronavirus, you are likely facing two traumas at once: the end of a relationship with someone you thought you would be with forever, and the upending of your life and inability to go out and be with friends who would otherwise console you. You or your spouse may begin doing things or saying things that seem completely out of character.
Take a breath. A deep breath. Try to center yourself. This is especially important if you have children who are looking to you to be their rock. They, too, are probably frightened, and need you to be stable for them when there is much instability around them.
And even if you do not have children, it is important that you make wise decisions now. After all, these decisions will likely affect the rest of your life. And you may find that these decisions may be easier if you just stop and take a deep breath first.
You may be stuck in your house, but, with Online Collaborative Divorce, that does not mean that you have to be stuck in your marriage.
Online Collaborative Divorce brings together the best parts of consensual dispute resolution with technology that makes the process more convenient than ever. And we can help you if at least one spouse (whether you or your partner) has lived in any part of Florida for the last 6 months.
In 2017, the Florida Legislature passed the Collaborative Law Process Act. In the Collaborative Law Process Act, the Legislature declared that “It is the policy of this state to encourage the peaceful resolution of disputes and the early resolution of pending litigation through a voluntary settlement process. The collaborative law process is a unique nonadversarial process that preserves a working relationship between the parties and reduces the emotional and financial toll of litigation.” Section 61.55, Florida Statutes.
If things are not going well in your marriage, whatever the circumstances, you want to avoid a nasty divorce. You have probably seen how recriminations, dirty court tactics, and endless fighting have ruined friends and family. Heck, you may still be feeling the consequences of your parents’ nasty divorce. And you are looking to spare yourself and your family the same trauma.
Fortunately, there are alternatives. One growing alternative is Collaborative Divorce.
In Collaborative Divorce, you and your spouse work together – outside of the court system – to find resolutions that work for your family. You and your spouse have separate lawyers for independent support, but the lawyers have one mission: find solutions. Collaborative Lawyers are unlike traditional lawyers in that the law prohibits them from fighting in court. This means that no time, energy, or money will be spent on frivolous lawsuits, opposition research, or damaging depositions.
Instead, Collaborative Lawyers encourage cooperation so you and your spouse can move on with your lives without harming your kids. Further, Collaborative Lawyers provide you with the independent legal advice you need to feel comfortable that you are making informed decisions.
Now may be a tough time if you are considering divorce. Your mind is racing, your future is unsettled, and your questions are unanswered. But rest assured, there are things that you can do to prepare for divorce.
Here are the top 3 tips for you to consider when you are preparing for divorce.
As part of any divorce process, you and your spouse are going to need to divide your marital assets and debts. These could include funds in checking accounts, savings accounts, money market accounts, retirement accounts, investment accounts, and other accounts. These would also include liabilities such as mortgages, credit cards, charge cards, and loans. Your marital assets might also include cryptocurrencies, such as Bitcoin, Bitcoin Cash, or Ethereum. You should make sure that you have access to (or make copies of) documents, statements, and/or screenshots reflecting all of these so you and your lawyer know what there is to divide.
Earlier this year, Melissa Sulkowski, R.N., M.A., L.P.C., of Erie, Pennsylvania, appeared on the Women Really Mean Business Podcast. Melissa is a Collaborative Coach, what we in Florida call a “Collaborative Facilitator.” She helps families who are going through the Collaborative Divorce Process remain focused on what is most important to them rather than the arguments of the past. She helps clients work on the emotional aspects of divorce and get through the tough moments so they can move on with their lives. Melissa also helps families develop parenting plans that are tailored to their children’s needs and developmental stages.
Additionally, Melissa is trained as a mediator and works with families in various forms of alternative dispute resolution. Her goal, regardless of which process is utilized, is to help families amicably reach agreements and stay outside of the adversarial court system.
You can find the audio of Melissa’s appearance on Women Really Mean Business at the following link: https://womenreallymeanbusiness.com/2019/09/melissa-sulkowski-women-really-mean-business-048-dont-let-a-crisis-force-you-into-self-care
Below is a partial transcript, edited for clarity:
Family Diplomacy managing attorney Adam B. Cordover recently spoke at the Reimagining Advocacy conference held at Stetson University in Gulfport, Florida. Cordover spoke on the topic of “Training Divorce Lawyers to Become Peacemakers.”
The conference was sponsored by Stetson University Law School’s Center for Excellence in Advocacy. According to the Center’s website:
The Center for Excellence in Advocacy promotes the continuing development of unparalleled advocacy skills through teaching, scholarship and research.
Stetson Law’s Advocacy Resource Center offers instruction to a worldwide audience through online video presentations by experts in the field of advocacy.
The Stetson Law community is committed to the concept of the complete advocate – one who commands a superior understanding of the law, the ability to persuasively present evidence, and the humanity to know when to do the right thing.
