We see it in the news and magazines all of the time. Publicly available divorce documents accuse a celebrity of secretly supporting a child born out of wedlock. Sports figures’ assets and judgment become public spectacles. Politicians and their spouses lob accusations at each other for all to see. Businessmen’s private details and dirty laundry end up as front page stories.
Fortunately, your divorce does not need to be in the public eye.
I strongly believe that the vast majority of Tampa Bay spouses who are considering divorce would be best served by engaging in the collaborative divorce process, where attorneys are used as problem-solvers rather than gunslingers. Decisions such as where children will sleep at night are made by parents rather than judges, and interactions between the parents are private and confidential rather than public and discoverable by their children in the future.
And yet, I would be remiss if I were to not underscore that there are potential disadvantages to the collaborative divorce process. In fact, in 2009, the American Bar Association Section of Dispute Resolution, Collaborative Law Committee Informed Consent Subcomittee published its draft Suggested Protocols to Obtain Clients’ Informed Consent to Use a Collaborative Process.
From the Suggested Protocols, families who are considering the collaborative process should know the following:
Here in Tampa Bay and around the world, collaborative practice is most frequently associated with divorce and other family law matters, as a non-adversarial method to resolve disputes. And yet, the collaborative process has been and is being used in many different legal matters, including in the area of medical malpractice.
Many times patients and their families simply want to know what happened when there has been an injury or fatality at a medical facility, and yet doctors feel hamstrung as they are afraid that any discussion will be utilized against them as an expression of culpability. The collaborative process provides a safe space for direct and confidential dialogue, and it also allows hospitals to be more open in examining incidents and figuring out how to avoid error in the future.
Below is a video from a pilot program, the Integrated Accountability and Collaborative Transparency (IACT) Program from North Carolina: Read more →
Collaborative divorce is a relatively new concept in Tampa. It is counterintuitive to think that attorneys would promote a concept that keeps divorcing spouses out of court. Further, who would think that attorneys would be willing to take a step back, and allow (i) mental health professionals to take the lead in emotional divorce discussions and (ii) financial professionals to be the point people on the division of assets and debts and other support topics.
And, yet, that is what collaborative lawyers do.
Collaborative practice is growing around the world, including in Brazil. Below is a video in Portuguese that discusses collaborative divorce in Brazil:
Stu Webb is an attorney from Minnesota who one day decided that he no longer wanted to be involved in the destruction of divorce court, and so he created collaborative divorce. Collaborative divorce is a private process where spouses become teammates rather than opposing parties, and attorneys focus on problem-solving rather than fighting.
Oftentimes accountants, psychologists, financial planners, therapists, and others are used to make sure that not just the legal needs, but also the emotional and financial needs of the spouses are met.
Collaborative Divorce has become more common here in Tampa Bay as families and attorneys realize that the court system should be seen as a forum of last resort, rather than first resort, to resolve personal issues.
Now, as it turns out, Stu Webb is not only the founder of collaborative divorce, but he is also an avid fan of Jazz. You can find a short video he helped create comparing collaborative divorce to jazz after the jump.
I recently had the opportunity to appear on Money Talk 1010 AM on the “Let’s Talk Law” Radio Program.
I was joined by Pasco and Pinellas family law attorney Audrey Jefferis, and we discussed, among other things, the similarities and differences between mediation divorce and collaborative divorce. The radio program, which you can listen to after the jump, was recorded in the St. Petersburg studios of Beasely Broadcasting.
I recently attended the 16th Annual Forum of the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals, and I had the opportunity to attend a workshop led by Gary Direnfeld, a social worker and collaborative professional in Ontario, Canada. He was an excellent speaker and was discussing cutting edge ideas on helping families.
Gary was recently on a radio program to discuss an age-old question: Can therapy help save a marriage?
Collaborative divorce and family law began 25 years ago, in 1990, when a Minnesota attorney named Stu Webb decided that he simply no longer wanted to be part of an adversarial divorce process. He strongly felt that divorce did not belong in the court system: decisions about where children should sleep at night should be made by the parents, and discussions of financial issues should happen around a private conference room table rather than in a public courtroom.
And so, he developed collaborative divorce, where parties agree from the very beginning that their collaborative attorneys cannot be used to fight it out in the court system.
The International Academy of Collaborative Professionals has put out a video commemorating 25 years of collaborative practice. You can find the video below the jump.
Rosemary Barkett, the first female Chief Justice of the Florida Supreme Court and former federal judge of the U.S. Court of Appeals for the 11th Circuit believes that the court system is not an appropriate place to resolve divorce-related matters.
![[PORTRAIT: Justice Rosemary Barkett]](http://www.floridasupremecourt.org/about/gallery/barkett.jpg)
Below are excerpts from a series of interviews of Justice Barkett conducted between 2006-2009 and recorded as part of the American Bar Association Senior Lawyers Division Women Trailblazers in the Law program:
Since I opened my law practice, I have received phone calls from potential clients asking if they could bring their spouse to the divorce consultation. Their purpose was to go to a lawyer together, hear the same information, and demonstrate that they are not trying to hire a “pitbull lawyer” or engage in dirty trial tactics. They simply wanted to dissolve their marriage, and they did not want to fight in order to make the divorce happen.
Almost all Tampa Bay divorce lawyers refuse such a request to meet both spouses. In fact, for the first few years, I also would not meet with both parties. The reason was simple: the Florida Bar has found time and again that it is unethical for an attorney to represent both spouses to a divorce because there is an insurmountable conflict of interest. Further, attorneys do not want to even give the impression that they are representing both spouses, so they avoid meeting with both spouses.
But now, I encourage both spouses to come to a divorce consultation. In fact, I charge half my normal consultation fee, because I believe that one of the best ways to ensure that a marriage ends amicably is for both parties to start the divorce process together.
