General information on dissolution of marriage
Equitable Distribution: How to Divide My IRA?
In a divorce proceeding, the court will divide the parties’ marital property and debts in a process called “equitable distribution.” The court starts with the presumption that property should be divided equally, but it may adjust the distribution based on various factors including (i) the relative economic circumstances of the parties, (ii) any interruption of personal careers or educational opportunities, and (iii) the intentional waste or destruction of assets.
Retirement accounts require special attention during the equitable distribution process. George Saenz at Fox Business News discusses this:
Not only are you getting separated from your spouse, but also your money. An individual retirement account, or IRA, belongs to the spouse that established it. You generally cannot transfer money from one spouse’s IRA to the other spouse’s account. An exception exists in the case of a divorce.
Divorce Saloon: Top 10 Things A Gentleman Should Do (Or Avoid) During Divorce
Divorce Saloon offers an interesting top 10 of how a gentleman should act during divorce:
1. Don’t call your soon to be ex-wife and her (female) lawyer by choice names.
2. If you are a public figure, refuse to air dirty laundry and speak about your wife’s private parts (Roseann Barr’s ex Tom Arnold, for example, made some references to her privates that very much were ungentlemanly, to say the least).
3. Don’t respond to violence from your spouse or with violence to your spouse.
4. Gentlemen can curse, but don’t go Mel Gibson.
Polygamy: A Basis for Annulment
Rose McDermott at the Wall Street Journal reports that cases of polygamy are becoming more common in Western countries:
Polygamy—or more specifically polygyny, the marriage of one man to more than one woman—has been widespread in human history. And it is becoming increasingly common, particularly in Muslim enclaves—including in Paris, London and New York.
A 2006 report by the National Consultative Commission on Human Rights reported that approximately 180,000 people were living in polygamous households in France. For decades, France allowed entrance to polygamous immigrants from about 50 countries where the practice was legal. When the French government banned polygamy in 1993, it tried to support the decohabitation of such couples if a wife wanted to move into her own apartment with her children.
In Britain, where immigration laws have banned the practice for longer, there appear to be about a thousand valid polygamous marriages, mostly among immigrants who married elsewhere, such as in Pakistan. Such families are allowed to collect social security benefits for each wife, although the government has apparently not counted how many are doing so.
In the United States, where numbers are more difficult to come by, anecdotal reports indicate underground communities of polygamists in New York City, particularly among immigrant communities from West Africa.
In Florida, one person cannot legally marry someone who is currently married to someone else. Further, Florida does not recognize polygamist “marriages” that occur outside of the state or country.
So, does a person who has been in such a relationship, either knowingly or unwittingly (i.e., one party did not know that the other party was already married), have legal protections?
A Parent’s Handbook for Raising Healthy Teens
Thank you to Uninterrupted TV for providing a link to “Navigating the Teen Years: A Parent’s Handbook for Raising Healthy Teens.”
This pamphlet is written by the National Youth Anti-Drug Media Campaign in cooperation with the American Academy of Pediatrics, National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy, National Prevention Network, NYU Child Study Center, and Parent Corps.
Mixed Martial Artist Chuck Liddell Requests “Full Custody” of Child. What Should You Request?
TMZ.com reports that retired mixed martial artist Chuck Liddell requested “full custody” of his child in a California courtroom:
Chuck Liddell Requests “Full Custody”
Chuck Liddell is in an L.A. courtroom asking a judge for full custody of his son, after the boy allegedly told him he didn’t want to live with his mom anymore.
Sources tell us 12-year-old Cade was visiting Chuck from Colorado, where he lives with [his] mom, Lori Geyer. Chuck claims the boy was depressed and upset and didn’t want to go back. And, Chuck says, Cade complained that he was “living with a severe toothache for 2 to 3 months.”
Chuck took Cade to a dentist, but feels his son’s “health and safety are at risk.”
Chuck’s lawyer mentioned in court the boy was allegedly abused by being forced to perform physical labor — including snow removal.
Though I frequently use the term “custody” when explaining family law issues to clients, the fact is that Florida courts no longer rule on “custody.” Instead, a Florida judge will enter an order concerning “time-sharing” and “parental responsibility.”
Though this may seem like mere semantics, it is important to know what to ask for, and what a judge will grant.
Special Needs Children and Divorce
California family law attorney Lisa Helfend Meyer recently discussed particular issues that arise in divorce cases involving special needs children:
A parenting plan for the typical child may not be appropriate for an autistic child or one with other developmental issues. For example, it’s not unusual for the typical 3 year-old child to be able to have overnight stays with the non-custodial parent. She can understand the concept of time and that she will see her other parent again. The special-needs child often has difficulty with transitions, she is comforted by the familiar and doesn’t like changes in environment. Likewise, she may not be unable to express herself verbally nor to understand abstract concepts like time. Custody and visitation decisions for a special-needs child must take into account many issues like these.
Limited Representation: A Cost-Effective Family Law Option
As the economy went south, everyone sought options to trim his or her budget. Some people skipped Starbucks and began brewing their own coffee. Others found creative ways to recycle their grocery bags. Still others completely transformed their driving habits to achieve better gas mileage. But one pronounced trend in the legal community has been the amount of people who decided to represent themselves in family court.
Unfortunately, there are often consequences to a party’s decision to save money and appear pro se (represent him or herself). I have had many litigants come into my office after attempting to proceed with no legal counsel and finding that (a) their case had been dismissed or they face contempt of court because they did not follow proper procedure, (b) they wasted their hard-earned dollars on unnecessary fees and “money saver” programs that became obsolete once the opposing party began contesting the matter, and/or (c) their case has dragged on because they did not know how to bring their matter to conclusion. But, alas, not everyone can afford an attorney to fully represent them.
Thankfully, Florida Family Law Rule of Procedure 12.040 provides a cost-effective option: limited representation, also known as unbundled legal services.
Technological Solutions to Shared Parental Responsibility
South Carolina Attorney Megan C. Hunt mentions some online tools available to help facilitate co-parenting:
But the reality is that co-parenting is HARD. It is difficult for two people who have decided they can’t get along to coordinate schedules, discipline, and all the other details of raising children.
Because co-parenting is so tough (and such situations are so common), there are now services and communities especially for parents who need help. One such program is Our Family Wizard, which provides a calendar for documenting parenting time, an internal message system for communications with your ex-spouse, the ability to keep a shared or private journal about your children, and a way to share the children’s health, education, and other records.
Helping Kids Cope With Divorce
School counselor Leslie King and teacher Daryl Sollerh offer some tips at the Huffington Post on how to help children cope with their parents’ divorce:
First, let’s face it: No one is a saint. No one is immune to the pain, challenges and uncertainties a separation or divorce can visit on a family — especially not children.
So even though mom and dad may be moving through some of the most potentially stressful and sad periods of their own life, they still are somebody’s mom or dad, and must try to find a way to help their child, even if they themselves feel as if they are not getting much help from friends or the world.
Should your child rage, do your best not to take it personally, even when it is directed at you. Try to give yourself the space and time to recognize that they too need to vent their feelings, especially the most gut-wrenching ones. It is better that they release the feelings inside them as best they can, instead of bottling them up, which could prove far more damaging in the long run.
