At a Glance

Even if your child’s bar or bat mitzvah is still years away, if you are facing divorce, the best time to address who pays for it is during the divorce, since Florida courts have no clear authority to order payment for a religious celebration once your case is final.

• Florida law gives courts authority to address education and extracurricular costs, but that authority does not necessarily extend to religious celebrations.
• Florida courts have shown real reluctance to make decisions tied to religious practice absent an agreement between the parents.
• Waiting until after your divorce is final often means you have lost your best chance to put an agreement in writing.
• Addressing it now, while you are negotiating your parenting plan or financial agreement, gives you far more control than hoping a judge addresses it years from now.

If your child’s bar or bat mitzvah is still a few years off, you might think it is too early to bring up during your divorce. It is not. Picture the moment you are working toward: your son or daughter standing before the congregation, Torah scroll open, yad in hand, reading from the portion they have spent months preparing. That moment deserves to happen without financial disputes hanging over it. Right now, while you and your spouse are already working through a parenting plan and financial agreement, you have a real opportunity to decide how these future costs will be handled. Once your divorce is final, that opportunity may be lost.

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