COLLABORATIVE DIVORCE AND FAMILY LAW IN FLORIDA. No matter how you look at it, divorce and family law matters are difficult to go through. Expectations of stability are shattered,

mistrust grows, and bills pile up. And then the litigation begins. Attorneys file and serve petitions, counterpetitions, requests to produce, and motions to compel. Each party hires dueling mental health experts to convince a judge that he or she should have more time with the children. Privacy is eliminated as each party’s life is probed and publicly questioned so that one side may gain a tactical advantage.

But there is a different way. A more civilized way. And it is called Collaborative Family Law (also known as Collaborative Divorce or Collaborative Practice).

We are a Collaborative law firm dedicated to helping people resolve personal disputes without destroying their families. We encourage the use of the Collaborative Family Law model in divorce, child custody, child support, alimony, post-judgment, prenuptial, and most other family law cases.  Further, Adam B. Cordover is an internationally-recognized leader in Collaborative Practice, a trainer who teaches other professionals how to help families Collaboratively, and author of an upcoming American Bar Association book on Collaborative Law.

Top 20 Most Viewed Blog Posts (First Half 2016)

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Ever since our new website, FamilyDiplomacy.com, launched in August of 2015, the readership on our Blog has steadily increased.  Though it is not an exact comparison, in the first 6 months of 2016, we had 2,750 individual visitors and 5,900 views, which is over a 55% increase in individual visitors and 70% increase in views over the last five months of 2015.

At the end of last year, we create a blog listing the top 10 viewed posts so far.  Now, you can find the top 20 viewed blog posts of FamilyDiplomacy.com over the first six months below (click the title to go to the blog post):

1. 2016 Collaborative Law Process Making Progress in Florida Legislature

Senate Bill 972, the “Collaborative Law Process Act,” is making its way through the Florida Senate and will hopefully become law this summer.  The Collaborative Law Process Act creates a legal framework for families to resolve disputes outside of court. The bill specifies that…

2. Governor Scott Signs Florida Collaborative Divorce Bill Into Law

On March 24, 2016, Florida Governor Rick Scott signed HB 967, the “Collaborative Law Process Act,” making Florida the 14th state to have Collaborative Divorce codified in its laws…

3. Collaborative Divorce

Divorce is a trauma. It is tough not only for the spouses who are separating, but also for their children, their friends, their relatives, and their community. If you can avoid divorce, whether by seeking help from a therapist or clergy, you should attempt to do so. However, sometimes a marriage is truly irretrievably broken…

4. Florida to Make Marriage Certificates Gender Neutral.  What About Birth Certificates?

According to a recent report in the Tampa edition of Creative Loafing, in light of the recent Supreme Court decision and issuance of marriage licenses to same-sex couples, Florida’s Office of Vital Statistics is making the state’s marriage certificates gender neutral…

5. Are Florida Divorce Courts Anti-Dad?

Over the past few years, there has been a movement to overhaul the alimony and child custody laws of Florida and other states. This is because husbands and fathers have felt like they are under siege in the family law court system. They have a glimmer of hope that, if only the laws were changed..

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TED Talk: Lawyer As Peacemaker

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Harvard Law Professor and Collaborative Attorney David A. Hoffman recently gave a TED Talk on “Lawyer as Peacemaker.”

You can find the TED Talk after the jump:

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Audio: Next Generation Divorce’s Derek Lucas Radio Interview

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Next Generation Divorce Co-Chair Derek Lucas recently appeared on WDUV 105.5 FM’s Sunday Morning, a news and public affairs program of Cox Media Group hosted by Mimi Lawson.  WDUV (also known as The Dove) covers New Port Richey and Tampa Bay in the Gulf Coast of Florida.

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Derek went on the program to discuss collaborative divorce, a private, respectful alternative to traditional courtroom divorce.  In collaborative divorce, both spouses retain their own attorneys, and the attorneys focus solely on helping the spouses reach an out-of-court parenting plan and marital settlement agreement.  This means that no time, money, or energy is wasted on opposition research, motion practice, or trial preparation.

Oftentimes, a neutral facilitator with a license in counseling or therapy is retained to help the spouses focus on what is most important to them (such as the health and well-being of their children) rather than the arguments of the past.  Further, a financial professional is many times used to ensure financial transparency between the spouses and to help develop a plan for support and the division of assets and debts that is personally tailored for the family.

You can find the sixteen minute interview after the jump:

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Jewish Prenuptial Agreements for Mutual Respect

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In Judaism, like in many religions, marriage is not only a union between two partners, but it is the intertwining of two souls.  However, according to Chabad.org, just as G-d prescribes a way to fuse two souls, G-d has also provided detailed instructions on how the souls can be reverted to the state of independence.

A divorce in Jewish law is formalized by a get, which is a dated and witnessed document within which the husband states his unqualified intention to divorce his wife.  If a husband does not provide his wife with a get, then the couple is not considered divorce, and so the wife cannot get remarried.

According to ITIM, an organization that helps people navigate the religious authorities’ bureaucracy in Israel, “Unfortunately, the get has become a tool for expressing anger and revenge and is a weapon in the hands of the one member of the couple who refuses to grant or receive the get and locks in (‘anchors’) the other party.  Such anchoring is especially problematic for a woman since it prevents her remarriage.”

To prevent the problems that come with a man refusing to provide his wife with a get, in May 2006, the Rabbinical Council of America reiterated a previous resolution that “no rabbi should officiate at a wedding where a proper prenuptial agreement on get has not been executed.”  Further, as a deterrent to get-refusal, the International Young Israel Movement, Council of Young Israel Rabbis in Israel, and the Beth Din of America suggest the use of a Prenuptial Agreement for Mutual Respect.

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Jennifer Gunnin: Working With A Peacemaking Collaborative Attorney

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My paralegal, Jennifer Gunnin, has now been with my firm for over 3 years.  She was with me when I was still accepting litigation work, and so she saw the toll that lengthy, nasty court battles had on divorcing spouses and their children.

And she has seen the transition of my practice.  In July of last year (2015), on the fifth anniversary of my shingle being hung, we changed the name of the business from The Law Firm of Adam B. Cordover, P.A., to Family Diplomacy: A Collaborative Law Firm.  Further, we pledged that we would not take on any new litigation cases, and that we would focus exclusively on helping clients resolve their family law matters outside of court via collaborative practice, mediation, and unbundled legal services (we also offer adoption and name change legal services).

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Since we shifted our focus to private dispute resolution, Jennifer attended a two-day basic collaborative training (one that is usually reserved for attorneys, financial professionals, and mental health professionals) so that she could better understand the process and help our clients who are utilizing the collaborative process.

One day, my office received a call from Forrest (Woody) Mosten, an internationally acclaimed mediator and collaborative attorney from California, about an American Bar Association book that he and I are co-authoring on Building A Collaborative Law Practice.  Jennifer picked up the phone, and they talked about the new focus of our firm, her training, and what it was like to work in a newly courtless practice.  Woody suggested that she write an article on Working With A Peacemaking Collaborative Attorney.

And so she did.

You can find her article published at The World of Collaborative Practice Magazine, part of which is published below the jump.

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Video: The Collaborative Way to Divorce with Stu Webb & Ron Ousky

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Stu Webb is the founder of collaborative law, also referred to as collaborative divorce.  And sometimes, it is refreshing to listen to his view of the process:  “Collaborative law is different in that it is a method in a divorce situation to get an agreement…by working with two lawyers all in the context of not going to court…There is a commitment on the part of the lawyers that they will not go to court.”  Stu made these statements in a video entitled “The Collaborative Way to Divorce,” which demonstrates what a collaborative divorce can look like, with commentary.

Joining Stu is Ron Ousky, a former president of the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals.  “What I ask clients [who are going through collaborative divorce] to think about is, ‘What is going to matter to you 20 years from now when you look back?  What are the things that you are going to care about,'” asks Ron.  “And usually they will say things like, ‘I want my children to be healthy.  I want to be able to get through this emotionally.  I want to get through this financially.’  Sometimes they’ll say, ‘I want to make sure my spouse gets through it right.  I want to make sure sure we end this with some dignity.’  Often when you get clients to focus on goals, you’ll find that they have shared goals, common goals.  They probably have more in common than they differ on.”

 

You can find the video after the jump.

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Collaborative Divorce and Small Businesses

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Divorce is one of life’s most difficult tests.  The stress that the traditional adversarial litigation divorce can have on employees cost business owners countless dollars every year.  Further, a private business is seen by Florida law as a potential marital asset, to be divided in divorce just like 401(k)’s, jewelry, or furniture.  When a business is put in the spotlight of a traditional courtroom divorce, Florida’s sunshine laws dictate that the remains of the business can be picked apart in detail by competitors sifting through a public court file.

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Collaborative family law (also known as collaborative divorce), by contrast, is non-adversarial.  The spouses’ attorneys are not seen as “opposing counsel,” but rather as teammates.  The clients themselves are not seen as “opposing parties,” but rather as co-parents or simply people looking to transition to the next stage of their lives.

Collaborative attorneys can only help the spouses reach an out-of-court settlement, so no time, money, or energy is spent on opposition research, dirty litigation tactics, or preparing for a costly trial.  This greatly reduces the stress on spouses and mitigates productivity losses.

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Veterans, Divorce, and Honor

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As we memorialize those who died while serving in the armed forces, we also thank the living men and women who protected our freedom.

According to Florida’s Department of Veterans’ Affairs, there are more than 1.5 million veterans living in the state.  And, unfortunately, just like the rest of the population, many of those who served in the military face a dissolution of their marriage.  Yet, many veterans do not know that there is a way they can go through divorce which is private, respectful, and, yes, even honorable.

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Any veteran going through divorce should learn about the collaborative process.

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Video: Child Wants Divorcing Parents to be Friends

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When most people go through divorce, they are consumed by their emotions.  No matter how you look at it, divorce is a trauma.  However, people oftentimes forget how the divorce is affecting children.  And they forget that children are keenly aware of how parents treat one another during divorce.

A video that has been going around the internet lately shows a little girl talking to her mom about how she wants her divorcing parents to be friends and treat each other well.  You can find the video after the jump.

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Collabortive Professionals Honor Florida Legislators

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Two hundred members of the Florida Academy of Collaborative Professionals (“FACP”) gathered in Tampa to honor Florida legislators and others for their leadership in passing the Collaborative Law Process Act (“CLPA”).  The CLPA, among other things, protects the privacy of families going through divorce.  It creates a statutory privilege (like the attorney-client privilege) that, except under limited circumstances, ensures that what is said during a collaborative divorce process cannot be used against a spouse in court.

In 2016, Senator Tom Lee introduced the CLPA bill in the Florida Senate.  Representative Cyndi Stevenson, with the support of Representative Dana Young, introduced a version in Florida’s House of Representatives.  All three were given awards by Florida’s statewide collaborative organization for helping to protect Florida’s families via the CLPA.

 

 

Pictured, from left to right, are Senator Tom Lee, Cole Jeffries, Robert Merlin, Judge Laurel Lee, Representative Dana Young, and Representative Cyndi Stevenson.

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